Some days I feel great elation: “At last! Here is the spot where I have grown! See how I did it!”
And others, I struggle mightily with the flesh – distractible, irritable, rushed, caring more for cleaning the outside of the cup (or at least my kitchen sink) than slowing down to listen, to adjust my hopes of efficienty to the pace of a child – to begin to listen once more to the still small voice after the hurricane of inner emotion.
I occasionally ask older women in jest if it gets better. The answers of course vary from person to person but the fact remains: we are so very human. And therein lies the problem. Paul says it like this, “For we know that the law is spiritual, but I am of the flesh, sold under sin. For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate” (Romans 7:14-15).
This life of faith, this call to holiness, this walking in love is one that must be repeatedly chosen…
In sleepless nights as well as restful dawnings
In raging crises as in valleys of peace
In company and in solitude
In financial strain as in times of plenty
In utter heartbreak as in days of feasting.
I am not perfect, nor even close to consistent. But I am learning better that I can trust in Him who never changes. He is the One who is present in every moment, teaching me how to be like Him.
Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever ~ Hebrews 13:8
Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! ~ Romans 7:24-25